My Reiki journey officially started in April and by September 2017 I had already gotten my Level 3 Reiki Master. I had no idea at the time why I felt such an intense draw to get all of my levels, a week after level 1 I had already reached out to my mentor asking for level 2.

Typically there’s an integration period, many spend time with each level, healing themselves, educating themselves and

just breathing into the energy that is Reiki. I, for some reason was being pushed to get each level fast.

During my level 2 one of the apprentice Master teachers had a vision of me, weighted down, struggling

up this huge mountain leaving behind the weight of the world I was carrying one step at a time until I reached the top, weightless and filled with joy, the mountain conquered and the past no longer fueling my future.

Lessons learned, trauma healed and a brilliant bright future…

Hearing this vision at the time made me scoff internally in a “yeah, fucking right” way as I was still feeling like I was at the bottom of this long, arduous trek I was on and yet it still gave me great hope. Hope that I clung to when my vibration was at it’s lowest, when I was feeling like one more step was simply not an option, like that next step would be the one that brought me to my knees, never to rise again, and yet I clung, knowing that there was a light at the end of the tunnel and that no it was not the coming train…

Sometimes in our darkest times all we have is Hope and that is what I chose. I chose to hope each and everyday that the vision was a snapshot of my future, the future of my girls and that I would some day reach the peak, flinging off all that was holding me back, dumping the people, places and things that no longer served my highest good and standing on top of that mountain, feeling the sun on my skin and the wind on my face, smiling up at the sky, arms wide open and ready to receive all the blessings meant for me.

I still had much to learn though, I was still trying to do it all alone and was forgetting the amount of love I was surrounded by if only I asked for help. On this journey we meet our soul family, soul sisters and our tribe but in the early days I had no idea what a tribe or sisterhood really was. I was still trying to go it alone as we’re often taught to do.

Each uphill journey begins at the bottom, sometimes feeling broken, beaten and just frigging done but as we take one step at a time, hold onto hope and trust that all is exactly as it’s supposed to be right now something miraculous starts to happen… The uphill walk starts to make sense, the weight gets lighter, we learn to love ourselves, ask for help and we build our tribe. We start to call on our tribe in times of great need and we are there for our tribe in ways we’ve never shown up for others before. The line that connects us is strong, it never breaks.

I know now why I needed to essentially send myself into a healing crisis of sorts, it was to get me ready to reach the peak of that mountain, to lose the weight, keep walking and to be ready to see the difference between our expectations vs what’s actually in our highest good.

What we want and what’s actually best for us are often two very different things, which I was about to learn.